i can say that im happy now even if im still in the process of moving on. im not puggled anymore in thinking about my tomorrow i just enjoy my life today. even if i'm still bored at home i know now how to deal with it without going out or anything. before if i feel my boredom will attack me i usually spend my day going out but now i can stay longer at home and it's been 5 days without going out so ecstatic. call me shallow or anything but im happy with that.

i think im getting stupid lately i can read properly and i'm having a hard time to get concentrated on what i'm doing. now i can't write properly i feel so shit about that. i'm getting afraid on what might happened to me if this things will continue. i hope it will be back to normal maybe i'm just tired and i don't have enought sleep (is this an excuse?) so things happen to me.

change topic: he didn't call me for 2 days and we don't see each other for 5 days. i miss him so much but i think it' s over. i try things getting over on it i have to move on. now it's okay to me if we don't see each other and talk maybe i have to learn to live without him. for 3 years that we've been together were inseperable except when we're fighting we gave space to each other. i tried things to work it out just to solve the issue that he was threw up to me. i thought he will change but as time goes on he became much worse and i hate that. he always does things that i'll get jealous i dunno what his reason why he was doing that to me. Is he want attention? duh he can't get my attention i rather stay away from him than giving that. he was so pathetic but im not mad at him. i already forgive him from what he did to me even he don't asy sorry. I knew he doesn't know the meaning of sorry.